Day 70. Tidbits about Tidbits

Monday, May 2, 2011

I’ve had two short posts in a row. So, my power adapter is now working again. I’m back. I’m rocking out in the Beautiful Starbucks. Since my last two posts were short, I’m going to try to make this post especially long, funny, poignant, and informative. Get ready.

Random tidbits

-Sunday, I had an audition for the role of a talk show host for a student’s art project. I know how to do that. I woke up and discovered that the audition I thought was at UCLA, nearby, was actually at UC-Irvine, and hour and a half away. I drove all the way there, walked in, and immediately auditioned, and walked out. I was there for four minutes. I didn’t want to just drive back so quickly, so I stopped in a sports bar to watch the end of the Celtics game. Boo Heat. It was a strangely friendly bar with just regulars sitting at the bar. They all introduced themselves to me and then made fun of me for carrying a hiking book to the bar. I got one guy’s business card, so my platonic flirting was really working.

-I couldn’t find a good place to hike, so I instead I went for a barefoot run on the beach at Laguna Beach, then I sat on the beach and read.

-I’m reading an awesome book that my friend, Sarah, gave me before I left. It’s called I’m Dying Up Here. It’s about the golden age of stand up comedy in LA in the late ’70s, when guys like Jay Leno, David Letterman, Richard Lewis, Richard Pryor, etc were all friends and performing together at The Comedy Store. It is especially fascinating for me because I’m performing there on Thursday night. I had a stressful dream about it last night.

-I found out yesterday, that I got the role of Late Night Talk Show host for the thing I auditioned for at UC-Irvine on Sunday. It’s just a one time art project sort of deal. I’ve gotten two roles so far out of seven auditions. I think that’s pretty good, even if they are both student projects.

-I shaved my neck hairs.

-Last night before I went to bed, I set an alarm for 4:30 a.m. so I could call Michelle before she made it to work. I knew that I wouldn’t be able to say much because my coherence is lacking at that time of day. But, she was excited by it, because it was unexpected. I think I was probably sleep drooling while I talked to her. She has low standards with me.

-I went to a Cubs/Dodgers game last night. I’m a lifelong Cubs fan, so I correctly guessed that they would lose. It is really cool to go about my day and then go to a baseball game. In the past, I’ve always had to drive three hours to get to a game. This felt so casual.

-The roller coaster of this adventure continues. My mood for each post I make depends on the hour. It’s really silly, but true. My situation doesn’t change that much, so it’s mostly about if I’m feeling optimistic or pessimistic about the same situation. It is really creating a lot of self reflection, some of it good and healthy, and some of it is just overanalysis.

-I had improv class yesterday. It is such a bright spot for me. My classmates are great. Most of them are coming to my stand up show on Thursday. Good people. Plus, improv is all about being in the moment, so in the three hour class, all the other worries kind of go away.

-I found a product I had never heard of yesterday. Toasted Bread. This is an example of an industry plum out of ideas. “Guys, we’ve run out of ideas since we started slicing it. What are other things people like to do with bread, that we can do for them?” “Sir, sometimes I leave the bread out for hours and it gets crusty.” “Perfect! We’ll call it ‘Toasted.’” Or, it’s for the Amish who have always wished.

-I ran into a guy I know. This always disorients me here, it’s probably happened three times. It takes me awhile to accept the reality.

-I had a friend ask me if the pictures I post on here are ones that I find on the internet, or ones that I take myself. I take them, baby. I was flattered that she asked. I’ve only ever had one picture that I didn’t take and that was a few days ago when I put up a picture of a fluffy Bichon Frise dog.

-My grandma has a new post on her blog. You should check it out. It’s about technology.

Day 59. The Distance Shrinks

Thursday, April 21, 2011

I woke up this morning with the immediate knowledge that I had overslept. You know the feeling. There is no grogginess, no wiping of the eyes, only a glance to the alarm clock to have a third party confirmation of what you already know. 

I was indeed late picking Michelle up from the airport, so I couldn’t get any cool shot of her coming down the escalator this time.

One thing I learned dating long distance before is that every visit is not going to be magical, and that’s okay. It’s good now, but we had some things to talk out. I’ve wanted to be honest in this blog, so I am.

This is difficult for us. It’s difficult in both similar and different ways.

Here’s the deal. We don’t really have much of a plan. We’re not planning on her moving out here at a certain time and we’re not planning on me coming home at a certain point. It is as open ended as can be. As a result, we both struggle with the uncertainty and the loneliness. I’m realizing the baseline of stress this gives us at most times.

At times we have a tough time relating to the differences of our other struggles. I tend to struggle a lot thinking about the money. This is why I eat very little and am losing weight. Talking to Michelle made me realize just how much I think about it in the back of my mind. Michelle tends to struggle more with the uncertainty and the emptiness of the house when she comes home. At times, we fail to appreciate and understand the other’s struggles. At times we feel distant.

That’s why you talk things out. It doesn’t change the circumstances, but it makes the distance shrink and the understanding grow.

Things are good. We had an amazing nap (I also sleep better with her around). We made dinner last night and watched TV. This felt great and ordinary, except the part where I helped to cook. Long distance makes you do strange things.

Tomorrow I’m going to film the deleted High Fidelity scene I mentioned yesterday. I got the part. This is a student project for a class that will be seen by tens of people in a class. It pays nothing. It may be silly to be excited for such a thing, but I am. Most everything I’ve done before is something I’ve been a part of creating, or something where someone has seen me performing improv before. This one, I just auditioned well. Hopefully, I will be able to add it to my reel (video acting resume), which needs to be beefed up.

Michelle has approved the content of this post.

Day 58. Say Anything in High Fidelity

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

I had an audition today on USC’s campus. It was for a student short. It’s not too big of a deal, but I’ve heard people say to do student films because eventually those students will be players in the entertainment industry. The USC campus is beautiful and I spent a lot of time walking around afterwards. The project the student is working on is an assignment for a class where they have to recreate a scene they haven’t seen before from a movie.

He chose a deleted scene from High Fidelity, a classic movie starring John Cusack.

I feel like I have a chance.

I’ve played John Cusack before.

When Michelle first came to visit me before we started dating, I took a chance. We had met at a camp two months earlier and she was visiting from Missouri to Traer, the small town in Iowa I was living in. I asked around and found out that it cost $35 to rent out the movie theater on the main street, so I got it out for us. We had the whole theater to ourselves as we watched Say Anything, another classic John Cusack movie. It was wonderful. It was an empty theater with just the two of us…and a high school kid running the projector.

As I recently mentioned, I was not a ladies man at this point at all. I reference, “at this point” to make you think I was at some other point. Keep that assumption. This was a big deal for me, I had never been bold with a girl before this at all. I don’t know why I chose to do it with Michelle, but there has always been something about her that makes me want to do those things.

Fast forward 4 1/2 years. I’m living in Springfield, MO, having chased Michelle there (another bold move). I’ve decided that I want to marry her and since I’m obsessed with surprises, so she has no idea. We never had the window shopping trips to jewelry stores or had conversations about getting married. Combine that with the fact that we had been dating a long time, I owed her a good proposal.

There was a new independent movie theater in town called the Moxie. I called them up and rented the theater for a night in early December. I got the ring, now I just had to stay quiet until the night came. This proved to be difficult when her best friend got engaged like ten days prior to my proposal. I have still not forgiven the proposer. I had to deal with a crying girlfriend in my kitchen while the ring was four feet away in a drawer.

Eventually, the night came and we watched Say Anything in an empty theater, just the two of us…and two twenty somethings running the projector. The movie is 3/4 of the way through when it gets to the iconic scene where John Cusack is outside the girl’s window holding a boom box that is playing “In Your Eyes” by Peter Gabriel. He’s wearing a trenchcoat, dark t-shirt, dark pants, and white high tops standing in front of a car.

http://movieclips.com/e/rxbG/

Boombox Serenade
Say Anything… at MOVIECLIPS.com

The scene shows him outside, then cuts to her inside, and then cuts back outside, only this time, on this night, in this version of the movie, the person now holding up the boom box in the movie is me wearing the trenchcoat, dark t-shirt, dark pants, and white high tops standing in front of my car.

Right before she looks at me to figure out what is going on, the words, “Michelle will you marry me?” come on the screen. Michelle freaks out screaming running up and down the aisles. I give John Cusack a mental high five and Michelle a kiss.

So, yeah, I can play John Cusack.

I pick that girl up from the airport in the morning.

Day 48. “Having a Good Talk”

Sunday, April 10, 2011

I went on a hike today. It is quite amazing to have mountains so nearby. I drove up toward Mt. Baldy. It was about a six mile hike, although I didn’t quite make it to the top because the snow got too deep. Yeah, I was walking in snow while wearing shorts. While I was hiking I was feeling pretty good because yesterday Michelle and I had a good talk.

This had been a tough week for Michelle. It has been her stressful time at work. Before I left we were both at a certain elevated stress level, so any new stress felt especially large. I’m a little beyond that now since I’m in Fantasyland. However, Michelle is still in the place that most people live, Realityland. Lately, this whole adventure has been more difficult for her.

“Having a good talk” is marriage speak for argument that eventually becomes a healthy and helpful conversation. Sometimes though, I think the argument is a necessary part of the process to get to the good stuff. My greatest comfort in all of this craziness in being away from my wife is that it’s temporary. I can do anything if it is temporary. The plan has been for Michelle to come out for the summer and then evaluate where we’re at with our adventure. I couldn’t figure out why Michelle didn’t feel the same comfort in that.

It turns out she was concerned that since everything is up in the air still (no income, temporary place to stay) that it wouldn’t work for us to be together this summer. These are the things you think about in Realityland. So, the comfort of the temporary nature of all of this wasn’t meaning much to her.

It seems like that’s how it works in marital “good talks.” It takes awhile to uncover the top layers to get to what is actually going on. In truth, I wouldn’t do anything to mess up us being able to be together for an extended amount of time this summer. If I have a bed to sleep on, she will too.

Day 44. Jeff’s Pump Up Tape

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Becoming the starting point guard for the white* B team in eighth grade didn’t just happen for me. Like other great accomplishments, it took a lot of hard work, practice, and some extra motivation. My seventh grade motivation technique of watching MC Hammer videos in the morning wasn’t cutting it anymore. I need some more immediate pumping up. So, I created what I called, Jeff’s Pump Up Tape. Jeff’s Pump Up Tape was a mix of upbeat and/or inspiring songs I compiled from tapes and the radio. I would put it in my off brand Walkman and listen to it on the bus on the way to places like North Scott and Northwest Junior Highs. The tape produced the desired effect, the adrenaline flowed. For a brief time my adrenal gland rivaled the output of my adolescent pituitary gland.

Here is a playlist from Jeff’s Pump Up Tape:

-M.C. Hammer, 2 Legit 2 Quit

-M.C. Hammer, Rollin’ On

-Rocky Soundtrack, Eye of the Tiger

-Rocky Soundtrack, Burning Heart

-Tina Turner, Simply the Best

- Footloose Soundtrack, Holding on For a Hero

-Mariah Carey, Make it Happen

-White Snake, Here I Go Again

-Celine Dion, Love Can Move Mountains

-Tom Cochrane, Life is a Highway

-Karate Kid Soundtrack, Moment of Truth

I never claimed it was good. I just said I made it. There were awkwardly long pauses between songs, snippets of the DJ cutting into the end of the song, and volume inconsistencies, staples of any good mix tape. I’m sure you can picture a thirteen year old Jeff bobbing his head to Celine Dion, preparing for the challenge ahead.

I’m facing a new challenge ahead with my adventure here and I think it’s time for a new Pump Up Tape. This would be volume three, as I made volume 2 in high school.

Here are my ideas so far:

-Eminem, Lose Yourself

-Jay-Z, Empire State of Mind

-Spoon, Underdog

-Ben Harper, The Fight Outta You

-Mumford and Sons, Roll Away Your Stone

-The Black Keys, Tighten Up

-Raphael Saadiq, 100 Yard Dash

I need more.

Let me know your suggestions.

This time I will be making a playlist, and not a mixtape. Although, I do have a tape player in my car.

*Being on the white B team was not a segregative racial thing. There was a white team and a red team, the school colors. We were fully integrated.

Day 42. Miss My Wife Sort of a Day

April 4, 2011

Today was a miss my wife sort of day.

We, of course, miss each other everyday, but some days you feel it a little more. It is not in any sort of weepy way anymore, just the feeling that something is askew. Right now, I would really love a day to go home for a day, hug my wife, sit on my couch and just jump in some normalcy and comfort as a refresher and then come back full steam ahead.

Things aren’t horrible on a miss your wife sort of day, it’s just this thought of how much better each part of the day would be with her around. Michelle is working hard through her first session of organizing and administering MAP testing (Missouri standardized test). She is very busy with that, which is kind of nice for her and kind of hectic at the same time.

I got stood up for lunch today by a nice man. He’s another friend of a friend. We talked on the phone last week and he really is a nice guy, but he didn’t show up (8 crapfirmation points). The great thing about my life right now is I can take it in stride because I just sat and read a screenwriting book I’ve been trying to get through. Then, I went to improv class, which I love (12 affirmation points). After class, I hung out with my classmates (6 affirmation points), watched a horrible basketball game, and went to an improv show. When I first saw the Skinny Improv back in the day I could only go to one show because I wanted to do it so bad that I couldn’t just watch it. It’s that same feeling for me now. I’m only getting in a few scenes a week in and I used to be in so many more. In a non arrogant way, it is nice feeling like I could have hung in there with the people in the show though (5 affirmation points).

I have an interview for a catering company on Tuesday. Not my ideal job, but rumor is they pay money.

So yeah, I’m not too articulate about it, but it’s a miss my wife sort of a day.

Day 28. The Striving and the Rooting

Monday, March 21, 2011

I’m reading a book on writing screenplays right now. At the heart of all screenplays is story. A screenplay has to have a good story. You have to have a main character that is relatable and you have show who they are and what their life is like. Then, as a writer, you have to shake up their life in a meaningful way, and create their journey to try to get life back to normal as they encounter new and different obstacles along the way. As a viewer, you have to see the character striving for things. As we watch, we pull for them more with each new struggle. Good stories have points in them where the protagonist seems stuck and the story seems done. In those times, we root for them all the more not to give up. There has to be risk, there has to be reward, and in the end, we desperately want them to win. But, the protagonist, in the middle of the story, has no idea how it is going to turn out.

This morning Michelle had to leave. She was here for nine days and we had a great time. We like being together, you know, like a married couple does. We were laying in bed and slowly rising when she checked her e-mail. She had gotten a response about health insurance back. See, I went on her health insurance right after mine ended for the downtime between when I left my job and when I was hopefully able to get individual insurance on my own. This was only meant as a stop gap measure, knowing we could not sustain it for very long because it’s a few hundred dollars a month. As I shared on this blog, I was ecstatic to learn that I got individual health insurance at the standard rate, despite my asthma and allergies. Great, right?

This morning, we learned that I cannot go off her insurance until July. My individual insurance is supposed to start April 1st. So, worst case scenario, I can’t push my start time back on my individual insurance and we’re paying for two insurance policies, when we can barely afford the cheaper one. Next worst case scenario, I’m on Michelle’s  for a long time and it is expensive by itself. Yuck, no other scenarios.

In all honesty, this morning felt like one of those moments where it’s too soon to go back, but I can’t figure out how this is going to work. The enormity of the task seems too big. My sinuses were killing me (I’ve reacquired allergies out here apparently), I had to say goodbye to my wife, and as we walked to the car I realized that I hadn’t moved the car on street cleaning day for a $68 ticket.

This whole thing kind of zapped my energy for my first improv class out here. I’m taking classes at Upright Citizen’s Brigade. We met in a small room nearish my home here. Improv is all about being in the moment, so it was nice to jump out of my head. The class was pretty basic, as I think all of Level 1 will be, but it was refreshing to do something here where I know what I’m doing. It was really my first experience with that. I’m looking forward to getting to know people in my class and be in an improv community. (28 affirmation points)

No idea how this is going to turn out.

But, I’ll keep pressing forward.

Day 22. Presenting Michelle the Guest Blogger

For those of you thinking you get another lovely dose of Jeff’s musings on his time out here, you are in for something a bit different– hopefully it is to your liking. Jeff has given me permission to hijack his blog for an evening. I am writing to update you on what we did in Los Angeles on day 22 of Jeff’s Mystery Year, and add a bit of Michelle pizazz to the whole thing.

To start, I should tell you that before I came out here I had only a vague idea of what Jeff was actually doing with all of his time in LA, except for meeting a lot of seemingly important people. It seemed like every day I would ask him where he was at in his giant list of things to do, (from here on out I will affectionately call it “The List”), and I always got confused about the process and its steps. So when Jeff told me last night that he wanted to spend the afternoon working on “The List”, I had to ask about a zillion questions to understand what he was actually working on. Turns out he spent a lot of time today emailing contacts and working on editing a You Tube video that in the end messed up and he has to re-do.

While Jeff was pecking away at this endless pile of duties, I went for a run. Well, that is to say, a walk/run. I decided to head north of where we are in West Hollywood to the foot of the Hollywood Hills, then I ran/walked West toward Beverly Hills. My reward was the start of a sun tan (hooray for California sun!), a giant blister on my toe, and seeing two models and the paparazzi take pictures of some lady I didn’t recognize.

Later, after Jeff came to a stopping point on “The List” and I finished some laundry, we went to watch The Moth, which is a storytelling show that Jeff and I like to listen to as a podcast. We also met with a friend who moved out here from Springfield around the same time Jeff did in pursuit of a music career. Overall it was a great evening and a fun day.

Jeff at one point looked at me and said he felt badly that we didn’t do more with our time together during the day, since I am technically on vacation. Honestly though, I liked giving him some space to work on his list. I am here not only to explore and learn about life here in Los Angeles, but to further my support of him chasing his dreams. I feel good about that.

I am so proud of him for everything he is doing out here, and I am glad just to be a part of it. I could tell that Jeff felt a bit daunted by his endless list today, and all I could feel was overwhelming pride at how hard he is working and how diligent he is. Wether it be writing me a gorgeous poem, being personable enough to meet all of the people he has already met out here, or having the endurance to keep working on a video that in the end didn’t load properly on You Tube, everything he is doing to chase his dream, to me, is admirable.

Day 8. A Nice ‘Community’

March 1, 2011

I’ve been pleasantly surprised at the generosity of people with their time in helping me out when I’ve been out here. Friends of friends and friends of acquaintances and acquaintances of acquaintances have been willing to sit down and talk to me and share advice. I think it’s because everybody who has succeeded out here was once in my shoes. It is a pretty neat deal.

Today, I had two examples of that.

I had lunch at Fuddrucker’s today. Yep, they have those here too. I ate with a guy named Ryan and a couple of his friends. Ryan is a friend of a fan of The Skinny Improv/Mystery Hour, so our connection is fairly small. Ryan is an improviser and actor and has been doing it for awhile now. He and his two friends were the kindest guys. Oh, and my lunch was paid for, crazy-kind for a guy with a small connection to me.

I have this whole long story about a woman I met on the plane when I first came out here in October to visit. Anyway, she works for the show, Community. She’s a great lady who has seen me do improv now and is just super helpful. Today, I went to the Paramount lot and got to see some of the show being filmed and got to talk to the actors in a crowded hallway right before they were getting ready to shoot. I played it off like I was cool, I hardly talked about local Springfield history at all.  One of them even recognized me from when I visited in October. I walked around the set, through the study room and cafeteria. There are just so many people involved in pulling off shows. Here is a blurry picture of me in the study room. The sound stage was also where they filmed Citizen Kane back in the day. A few steps down was a legit looking New York City block. They filmed the Godfather there and a number of other movies. 

The coolest thing may have been that my friend took me in and we talked to the casting directors for like a half hour. I played it off like I was cool, I didn’t talk about my love for foreign nationals at all. Casting directors determine who gets cast in shows, so they’re kind of a big deal. They said to send them my headshot. I said, “Oh my God.”

Also, Glee shoots on the same lot, so I saw some of the cast walking around with lunch. I requested a mashup of some kind to no avail. I feel very fortunate to have such nice people helping me out, it is definitely a highlight of my time so far.

Then I came home and had dinner with my landlords/roommates/childhood soccer coach/friend’s parents. More kindness.

Just playing it off like I’m cool.

Day 7. No Full Length Mirror

Monday, February 28, 2011

My last couple of posts have focused on the melancholy things. The truth is, this has been a lot of things. I have now been here one week and I’ve gotten a lot done, quite a bit really.

One interesting facet to my living situation is that I only have access to a mirror over the bathroom sink in my palatial room, so I can’t see all my clothes on my body at once, it’s hard to get a good impression of my outfit with my shoes. So, I set up my camera on a timer and take a picture of myself.

Here are those pictures:

The other thing that is evident in these pictures is that when Michelle is not around I have a hard time dressing myself. I look like a 5 year old that got to dress himself for school.

Also, I don’t eat very well when Michelle is not around.

Here is an actual breakdown of my diet right now:

-Cheez Its 21%

-Life cereal 12%

-Milano cookies 18%

-Dehydrated banana chips 7%

-Toothpaste accidentally swallowed 3%

-Smoothies 17%

-Pollution 22%

I’ve uploaded two new videos today to YouTube. These are of me doing standup immediately after the last Mystery Hour

and