Day 201. Wedding Party Olympics

Saturday, September 10, 2011

Aaah love.

I was in a wedding today. I love weddings. Yes, I love the love, and I love being a part of the special day, but I also love to think about it as a competition. I like to think of it as the Olympics.

It’s pretty simple, really. As a guy, you can be in a wedding in three standard ways, best man, groomsman, and usher. In terms of Olympic competition, Best Man=Gold, Groomsman=Silver, Usher=Bronze. I have now been in 10 weddings.

Here is my medal breakdown:

Gold 3

Silver 5

Bronze 2

Obviously, I’m happy with my medal count, ten medals is pretty good for an athlete my age. Certainly, I’m past my prime, the medals don’t come with as much frequency, but I can’t complain. As with any Olympic competition, you would rather have mostly golds, but you will take what you can get. To get to the next level, and get my golds up there, I think I’m going to have to focus on my training. I will devote a lot of time to calling friends just to say hi, remembering birthdays, talking less trash in fantasy football, and pushups. As they say, second place is the first loser, and I don’t plan on coming in second anymore. After all, this is about pride, and I have competition.

Here is the overall medal count:

_____ Jeff Paul China

Gold 3 2 4

Silver 5 4 3

Bronze 2 2 2

Total 10 8 9

It bugs me that China has one more gold, but I’m still up overall. As far as this particular Olympic competition went, it was a good time. The opening ceremonies (rehearsal and rehearsal dinner) were great, the pageantry was beautiful. The morning of the wedding was fun, we helped set up, I got to see a bit of the Iowa-Iowa St game, we goofed around a lot. At one point, best man Nick and I got on the roof of the building and snuck into another building, only to get busted by Tim, the groom.

This was our exchange:

Tim (poking his head up on the roof): Guys! Guys!

Nick: What?

Tim: You have to get down, right now!

Nick: Why?

Tim: You have to!

Jeff: Oh, you look cool, can I take your picture?

Tim: Yes! But then get down! But, yes, absolutely!

The wedding was lovely. It was an outdoor wedding, and honestly, it rained for 40 minutes the entire day, and it started at 5:00 when the wedding was to begin. But, we moved it inside and it was awesome.

The closing ceremonies (reception) was a good time. I judge a wedding by how good of a dance party the reception is, and it was a great dance party. I may have embarrassed Michelle it was so good.

Overall, it was a great time, I increased my medal count and made a pretty good showing. We’ll see what the future holds, I can feel China breathing down my neck.

Let’s be honest, the real winner here is the tuxedo rental businesses.

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3 Comments

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3 responses to “Day 201. Wedding Party Olympics

  1. Tracy

    If Tyler promises to make you his bestman, will you find him someone to marry? (I have to approve, of course.)

  2. “Let’s be honest, the real winner here is the tuxedo rental businesses.” lol. Honesty at it’s best.

  3. Julie H

    Um. Seems like you left off the option of “groom”…

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