Wednesday, December 14, 2011
From 1997-2010 I was without a job for about 6 months total. In 2011, I’ve been without a job for about 6 months. What does this teach me? One, 6 months in 13 years? I’ve been trying too hard. Two, this year has taught me a lot about filling my time when none of it belongs to The Man. Certainly, not having a job is no vacation, because on a vacation you don’t think about money, it’s your time to splurge. When you’re unemployed, you think about money every step of the way.
Activities for the Unemployed
-Look for a job. Of course, I had to get the obvious and boring one out of the way.
-Day bowling. This is my plan with my friend, Jeff, for the next week. At first it seems sad, but when you think about it…nevermind…it still sounds sad.
-Puzzles. You loved them when you were a kid. Start with the edges, end with the sky pieces.
-Write that novel you’ve always been thinking about. Stett Brockton, hero CPA, needs to have his story told. The W-9 gang needs to be taken down. You have a great idea, you have the time, now make it happen.
-Crafts. When I was a kid, we had a Things to Do Box for rainy days. Find some odds and ends around the house, locate some Scotch tape and some Elmer’s glue, put them together and you have a sculpture. If you have a spouse, or a roommate, they’re guaranteed to love it.
-Prank phone calls. Sure people can see your phone number now, so pranking ain’t what it used to be, but when they call you back, you can keep it going. Accuse them of pranking you. They’ll think to themselves, “This person sounds like a grown man, maybe they’re right, maybe I am the one who pranked them. An adult wouldn’t do this.” Boom, you’ve won.
-See how high you can count.
-Learn an employable skill. Just kidding, that’s boring.
-Blog about your days. You can fool yourself that it matters.
-Turn your yard into a golf course. Golfing is expensive, digging your own holes is not.